You may like to consider yourself as a rational being, however, in reality, your life is inspired by Melbourne Animal Removal. They inspire decisions, move you to action, or paralyze you in anxiety, anxiety, and fear. They are the cornerstone of your best memories and the bond that produces deep connections with others. In this guide, we’ll explore four principles for working with your emotions and three tips to handle intense feelings such as anger, anxiety, and sadness when they threaten to overwhelm you.
Emotions are volatile. It is possible to feel anxious one minute, angry the next, and then have waves of sadness flood through you seemingly out of nowhere. Because they can take you on such wild rides, it is natural to be somewhat wary of strong emotions – and do everything you can to prevent them or keep them at bay.
You’ve seen what can happen when so-called”negative” emotions like fear, anger, and sadness overwhelm you or others. You have memories of unskillful expressions of these feelings you wish you could forget. Images of psychological trauma are stored deep in your subconscious, warning you to be wary once you feel these emotions or witness them in different folks. Just thinking about these emotions makes you feel vulnerable.
In the face of vulnerable feelings, a more logical approach may feel safer. It’s easier to concentrate on your ideas and not venture into the scary world of feelings. However, reason has its limits. You may think you are more rational than you are. While you can logically weigh choices or consider unique thoughts, the final”Yes this” and”Not that” arises from what”feels right.” Even if you’re focused on thinking rather than feeling, in the long run, your decisions and actions are based on your”gut feelings.”
Because emotions are so closely connected to actions and decisions, as well as being connected to threatening memories along with your most powerful inspirations and interpersonal connections, it is important to understand how to handle them skillfully. Let’s explore four principles for relating to emotions in a mindful, intentional, and empowered way.
Four Principles to Handle Emotions Skillfully
Though your first inclination when you feel overwhelmed by uncomfortable feelings, such as anxiety, anger, and sadness, may be to divert yourself, downplay the feeling, or run away, this just causes emotions to go underground, into your subconscious mind, where they are stored as strain on your body, eat away at your peace of mind, and finally surface as sickness. Repressed emotions are the basis of compulsions and bad habits, as well as the origin of overwhelm and flareups in relationships. You want to address them.
Emotions arise to give you specific details on what is going on inside you, around you, and with others-and this information will stick with you till it’s acknowledged and heeded. Thus, it’s important to shift your perspective out of fear of emotions to viewing them as useful guides. Emotions arise with information you need about your life and the energy to take action on this information. Thus, the number one principle of skillfully handling emotions is to stop ignoring them and pay attention to what they have to show you.
What are the sensations happening inside your skin? Especially, notice any areas of current discomfort, since these hold important clues to what you will need to know and do now.
If you are not accustomed to checking in like this, you may not feel much at all or you may feel strong aversion to feeling discomfort. That’s OK. Stay with it. Remain current with whatever feeling or lack of sense is there. Attention to feelings takes practice. It’s a real skill you can learn. Remember, if you do not pay attention to what your emotions are trying to tell you, they get stuck on repeat and keep cycling through you.
2. Mindfulness of everything you feel shifts your relationship to it.
When extreme feelings arise, rather than immediately trying to do something about them, make care to witness, listen to, and feel them. This act of mindfulness brings new neural connections into your habitual emotional patterns which enables them to shift. You bring a layer of awareness to your emotions which changes how they impact you.
Mindfulness releases you from being”gripped by” your emotions in a manner that”takes you over.” You gain freedom and space inside and around the feelings you”have,” by recognizing that feelings do not define”who you are.” They’re simply information about what is going on inside you, around you, and with others.
Knowing that emotions are transient is reassuring when emotions run strongly or cycle repetitively. When you shine the light of consciousness in your emotions, you can see what they must show you, take suitable action, and enable them to release.
4. Every emotion carries a message.
Once you’ve tuned into the feeling of an emotion in your body, inquire what message it has for you. What is this feeling telling you about how you’re relating to a circumstance, to yourself, and with others?
Given this information, what action would be useful for yourself and others?
Because we aren’t generally taught to recognize the significance in emotions, we often overlook, ignore, or prevent their messages. When we do so, psychological energy builds into overblown high play to receive our attention. It is as if our feelings state,”O.K. you didn’t get the message in my civil indoor voice, so I’m going to shout it in you.” You then feel intense anger, overwhelming sadness, or anxiety that’s through the roof.
When emotion has amped up to that point, it can be helpful to bring it down a notch to a manageable level. A few simple actions can help you do so.
3 Tips to Handle Intense Emotions
1. Pause, close your eyes, and take a few slow, deep, gentle breaths.
Stop what you are doing, close your eyes, and concentrate on slow, deep, gentle breathing, in and out through your nose. Close your eyes and engaging in this sort of breathing activates your body’s natural relaxation response, which will help dissipate the pressure, energy, and intensity of strong emotions.
2. Feel the sensation of the emotion in your body.
Notice where the emotion can be found inside your body. Feel the quality of feeling there. Noticing feelings as sensations helps you see them more objectively, so you obtain space from what you’re feeling.
3. Adopt the mindful perspective of a curious observer and query the emotion as if it’s a friend who wants to tell you something important.
Remember that Mindfulness means paying attention, on purpose, at the present moment, without judgment. With this mindset, ask your emotion questions, as if it is a friend who is trying to provide you valuable information and you are a scientist seeking discovery.
When you follow these suggestions, you change your perspective and choose the”over-the-top” intense edge off of what you’re feeling. Intense anger may downshift into a firm”no,” intense sadness can mellow into”letting go,” and higher anxiety can settle into a motivating spur to action.
Once a feeling has downshifted in intensity, it’s easier to listen to it, feel it, and react appropriately. You can take action to address the current situation.
The bottom line is that, rather than fearing the psychological intensity of fear, anger, and sadness, see if you can move toward those feelings with a mindful, curious mindset. As you do that, notice how they shift and direct you to what you need to do right now.